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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Cap'n Jones' LiveJournal:

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Wednesday, October 5th, 2005
2:28 pm
Smart Paladin
51% Combativeness, 30% Sneakiness, 64% Intellect, 63% Spirituality
Valorous! Noble! Or possibly just a self-righteous jerk (but with the brains to keep you alive!)... You are a Smart Paladin!

Paladins are holy warriors. They are valorous defenders of the light.
Unfortunately, most of them are so ardent in their defense they tend to
meet sticky ends faster than you can say "rampaging red dragon." Many
people look up to Paladins, while others just consider them stuck up,
overbearing, or self-righteous.

Fortunately for you, unlike most Paladins, you're pretty smart.
Which means that you're more likely to fall into the "admired"
category, rather than the "obnoxious" or "dead" categories.

Much like the crusades, you manage to combine violence and
religion, though unlike the crusades, you add a healthy does of
intelligence. You may be a staunch defender of the faith, a valorous
champion of the weak, or the stuff that jihads are made of. Which ever
one you are, just be happy that you�ve got the smarts to back it up and
make it work.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 42% on Combativeness
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 32% on Sneakiness
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 49% on Intellect
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 86% on Spirituality
Link: The RPG Class Test written by MFlowers on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test
Sunday, October 2nd, 2005
11:21 pm
Attention 49ers Staff:
You're cut.

Except Ulbrich, Parrish, Young, Smith, and Lloyd.

Better luck next year.

Current Mood: disappointed
Tuesday, September 13th, 2005
11:26 am
So..... how's....stuff?

Current Mood: inquisitive
Thursday, August 25th, 2005
5:26 pm
You should have been there
John (my brother): Hey mom, listen to this. (holds up ear buds with rap music playing). Do you know this?

Mom: No, who is this?

John: 50 Cent.

Mom: I don't know who fifty cents is.

John: He got shot nine times and lived.

Mom: Well, they should have gone for ten.
Monday, August 22nd, 2005
6:25 pm
A Conan joke from a while ago
"It's reported that Drew Barrymore said she will get in to directing once her boobs start to sag. Yeah, incidentlly, that's the same reason Michael Moore got in to directing."

Current Mood: heh
Tuesday, July 26th, 2005
12:22 pm
Let's get to know each other
I found a website that shows the "faces of WoW." Mine's not up yet, but how can I compete?


Current Mood: rofl
Thursday, July 7th, 2005
12:52 pm
Here we go again
Terrorist attack in London. Guess who did it? One of my favorite sayings: Not all Muslims are terrorists, but all (or nearly all) terrorists are Muslims.

I hope the socialists in England don't say, "We will not tolerate these actions. We are withdrawing all militant forces stationed around the world engaged in fighting terror."

I also hope we don't hear the line from Team America (paraphrased): "Who do we blame for these attacks? The supplier of the weapons, or the terrorists themselves? No. Blame Team America..." Or England or any Western civilization with a spine fighting off the onslaught of Islamofascism.

In other news I am going to finish college, move to Hawaii, surf the mornings, work the days, and BBQ in the night. I'll finish learning Japanese so I can set up a tour guide business, date a Japanese girl for a while but eventually settle down with a home-grown girl. Life will be good.
Monday, May 2nd, 2005
11:39 pm
Tonight I learned that if you slice the end of your finger off while cutting bread, you get to leave work early.

P.S. It's pretty sick though, and I'm kinda squeamish. Best I just stay at work and let the girls cut the bread.

Current Mood: GladIstillhavetenfingerends
Saturday, April 9th, 2005
3:24 pm
Another haiku for a breif post
Employment is strange
Everybody wants a job
But people hate work
2:49 am
The big Russian bear
Dances on the midnight star
Da, Nyet, Da, pivo

Current Mood: haikus are deep insights
Thursday, March 31st, 2005
7:51 pm
For any of you who think the Religious Right is taking over and the dreaded theocracy is moving in on you and your personal lives, you can rejoice, Shiavo is dead.

Left logic: If a Marine shoots an (innocent?)Iraqi that may pose a threat to himself and his crew, that is means for life in prison; but if a woman in a vegetative state who doesn't feel pain is denied food and water against the wishes of her entire family at the will of her husband who is living with another woman it is found acceptable.

True story. I am disgusted.
Tuesday, March 22nd, 2005
7:22 pm
A post?
World of Warcraft you broke my heart. I was going to spend my entire day off with no responisiblity by playing you for several hours, but you had to be updating and then down all day.

Other stuff:

-I will be back in school on Monday to be on the way to get rid of my math requirements. I will be out of Clark by fall (shut up) and hopefully in University by winter. My life will be moving along. I think I've decided on getting my masters in business and minoring in philosophy. At least that way I can study philosophy and land a job that will make bank.

-Scott and I are going to work out daily before a class we share, and perhaps by the end of the quarter I will appear toned.

-I got a rad new cd deck for my truck that is SIRIUS satellite ready, and can play CD-R data discs with mp3 files or WMA files, so I can fit approximately 700 megs worth of songs on one CD. That translates to 112 Metallica songs (my whole collection) on one disc. The extra wattage and amperage make my existing speakers sound fuller and can get louder before they distort. Some time in the future I want to put an amp behind my seat and plop a sub in the secret compartment underneath the seat in the back. My truck will be a mobile concert hall.

-I turn 21 in one month and 5 days, and I look forward to drinking with buddies in the pub, and buying booze for Chris May. I'm not going to pay for it, I'm just going to buy it. With a gratuity of course.

Current Mood: SUPER RAD
Wednesday, March 16th, 2005
2:08 pm
Sunday, February 27th, 2005
11:28 pm
Money makin'
I've thought of a new way to get rich quick. Lots of people read horoscopes and actually believe in the signs of the Zodiac and whatnot, and my new idea can become a fad, bringing in truckloads of money, then taper off, then come back 20 years later when I'm broke. My idea is that instead of using Zodiac signs for predictions, we use the Seven Deadly Sins. Check it out:

"Today may get a bit sticky today, dear Glutton, as Easter candy hits the market today with limited edition Raspberry filled Cadbury eggs. Plan to pack a few extra napkins on your way to the store."

Or, "Spring time is coming soon you sleepy Sloths, your future may entail bits of nagging from relatives or coworkers from lack of initiative due to desires to be out in the hammock. It's best to split up nap times into smaller chunks so you can get those pesky nags off your back."

I could write several books on which Sins go together well and which ones clash. Lust and Greed go together well, Anger and Greed get along fine, but not as well as sloth and Gluttony. And everyone should stay away from Pride. Those people are pricks.

I could also come up with symbols for each one so I can sell stickers, shirts, necklaces and even coffee mugs. Sloth could be ZzZz, Gluttony is a piece of bacon, and Anger is a middle finger.

Current Mood: creative
Saturday, February 26th, 2005
10:12 am
I worked for 10 hours last night.

I added two people to my "Go Fuck Yourself" list. That's impressive since that list never existed before. The two members are Debbie Bingman and Amy Picknet. They work in banquets at the Heathman Lodge, and if you ever see them, say, "Go fuck yourself."

Debbie is more concerned that I have something to do and not standing around than what she's supposed to be doing, even though I get there two hours before her to set up, and stay two hours to tear down, and what she wants me to be doing is her work. One time there was a sweet fire at work, and I was watching the firemen cut open the building to get to the source, and she walks outside and says to me, "I've got a tray you can take to the dishroom." Of course that isn't the only instance, but imagine that sort of thing happening at least 5 times a shift, every shift. She needs to go fuck herself.

Amy is a scrawny bitch with BO all the time and she always treats me like I'm stupid, even though she's my age with kids and a dumbass boyfriend who makes her cry every other night taking her away from work. I've got pretty thick skin, so her snide comments usually are wasted on me since I refuse to engage her in conversation. But last night I almost went ape shit on her when we were clothing some tables. It was around hour 8 at midnight and I wasn't doing it properly due to fatigue (and if you're too tired to cloth a table, you need to go home, which I did around two hours after this incident), and she started getting even more bitchy than her normal self. Eventually she yells, "KEVIN! STOP!", and I looked at her with my best "If-you-do-anything-like-that-to-me-again-there-is-no-amount-of-teeth-and-nails-that-can-stop-me-from-taking-my-knee-and-driving-your-nose-into-your-brain-you-smelly-whore," look and kept doing what I was doing before. Pssh, and she wanted me to save empty beer bottles from customers for her so she could turn them in for money. She need to go fuck herself.

Current Mood: Go fuck yourself
Monday, February 14th, 2005
5:25 pm
Man, I had no idea World of Warcraft was impossible to find. I'm about ready to bust someone up.

Current Mood: aggravated
1:33 pm
Ah, another February 14th!

You know what that means.  Anybody who's anybody gets (has) to look at their significant other and profess their undying love by spending loads of money on food, flowers, chocolate, stuffed animals and whatever else the "holiday" requires you to.  Now I'm not coming down on Valentines Day, I think it's great that we've commercialized love.  It's good for the economy.  But don't you think it would be great if Valentine's Day was sort of a floater holiday where couples can get together and celebrate themselves when they wanted to rather than when Hallmark says so?  The way it would work is each couple would recieve a ticket book from participating companies once they've reached a certain length in their relationship and they are good for Valentines-esque things for one day so that they can celebrate Valentines in, oh say, July.   

I mean think about it, no more guys feeling resentful when they feel compelled to go out and buy stuff that the chick doesn't really care about, but thinks she does.  And if there's one thing that can stifle love is resentment.  Instead let's have it so that each couple gets to spend Valentine's Day on their own accord, so they can do it when and how they want, not when and how they ought to.  I think it would be more meaningful, and we would have less saps without dates writing about how shallow and meaningless this holiday really is while the rest of the people who are part of couples say to themselves, "Geez, I'll jump through the hoops as long as I'm not one of those guys." 

Current Mood: thoughtful
Saturday, February 12th, 2005
6:21 pm
Oh man, so me and my broham were standing in line for tickets for an upcoming musical event, and then we overhear the lady say, "yeah, it opened for sale today, and its already completely sold out." We were like "crickets!", and we were about to get out of line but then it was out turn. We asked her if it really was true, and she checked the comp, and holy shit, she discovered that there is a whole other show scheduled for the next day. So we snagged our two ticks and we will be jammin old school style with Bob Dylan on March 12th. We rule.

Current Mood: ultra rad
Friday, February 11th, 2005
9:17 pm
It's nine on a Friday and I'm at home with no pants on about to read a book while watching over my brother and his friend. Someone needs to have a party real soon. I need to get my drink on with some ladies. Or at least go drinking.

Current Mood: fridays used to rule
1:58 pm
It looks like Tom Waits is going to be in an upcoming movie. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0420087/

So that's pretty cool.
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